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Your Ten Guaranteed ways to Establishing Impact Communication
Do you create Repulsion or Pleasure in your communications?
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Make Eye Contact and look deep into the person's eyes for a minimum of 5 seconds. Look directly into the centre of the eye not around the face. You want the other person to know you are present with them. Repeat this process regularly until it becomes a natural part of the process you are engaged in.
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Match their Breathing, both from the position of where they breathe and the rhythm in which they breathe. Watch from where the person is breathing (are they breathing high in the chest, or maybe lower chest area under the breastbone or very low levels deep into the abdomen?) Is their breathing quick, even, slow, very slow… attune yourself to their manner of breathing?
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Match their Voice tone and Quality, note if they speak fast, slow or very slow. This will usually be in rhythm with their breathing. Is the tone and pitch of their voice, high, middle or is it deep? Do they inflect upward or downwards within their speech pattern?
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Listen closely to the words they use and mirror back to them their own language patterns. These patterns are called Representational Systems and they are the ways in which we receive, process, store and retrieve information and experience. In other words, the five senses of sight, hearing, touch, taste and smell. By using their language you begin to pace the communication and, therefore, you will be able to lead it in a different direction as required.
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Begin deconstructing their sentences to define their beliefs and values. As you listen with great attention to the words and sentences the other person uses, along with the emphasis they place on certain words, you will be able to ascertain what is truly important to them. This information is the unconscious key to your audience, client or customers soul. Because when you know what is truly important to them you will be able to impact, persuade and influence with absolute confidence that subliminal success is inevitable.
Let us consider the following question posed by one of my delegates on a recent course.
' I see what you mean but surely building rapport is simply about trust'.
The words used by the delegate are indicated in bold italics and they hold valuable information that will assist us in understanding what is of high value and importance to this person. Giving clear direction to what must be said in order to persuade them that this material is worth their trust.
SEE – when placed at the beginning of a sentence with an inflection up indicates that this person is processing information from a visual preference and is questioning the credibility of the material. (Click Representational Systems) This means that I must speak with a quick pace, inflect up and use the word ‘see’ at the beginning of my answer. I am acknowledging their question and also asking a subliminal question in return.
I see what you mean... |